One of these nights...

One of these nights I'm gonna write something absolutely amazing and powerful and I'm really looking forward to it.

So far, I haven't figured out what that is, exactly... but I'm okay with that.  I'll keep on writing until I do.

I'd love to write more, and really, I DO write more than I post on this blog because I prefer not to just throw everything I think onto a blog like a diary for everyone in the universe to read.  I work a lot, and I love what I do 99.44% of the time but I would love to have more time to write.  I spend too much time trying to make money. Well, I might as well while I'm able and my kids aren't little anymore so that I can retire before I die.  I tell people I write every chance I get but it's really not true.  If it were true, I'd have a lot more material to read.  I have many, many stories in my head that I really should put into writing, because I know I'm not going to live forever (at least not in this realm, and I'm not sure how much of my brain will make it through the life I'm living now) and I don't want the stories and characters to die with me. After I'm gone my kids can pass this stuff on to other people, or just give them away, but hopefully, I'll get some of them out into the world and let the universe decide whether they're worth keeping.

There were also people who once walked this earth and not just through my brain whose stories shouldn't be forgotten either.  Those who passed after about 2005 will have more information about them on the Internet for future generations than those who passed before that, and there are stories in the old newspapers and databases for those who wish to look for those folks.  Still there are people who lived quiet and simple lives, whose stories weren't compelling Nicholas Sparks novel fodder (or even Lifetime movie fodder), who've left serious marks on the manuscript of my own life.  My grandmother was one... one of her father's seventeen children as well as one of her mother's eleven.  Her oldest sister Lorene was evidently unable to bear children of her own, but I never, ever heard her complain about that, or talk about it at all.  I never asked her why she didn't have children, maybe because I was afraid to bring it up.  Her husband had lost two children in the Christmas Eve crash that claimed his first wife and left him with only his son. Maybe she figured it might've been better to have had no children at all.  His son gave her four step-grandchildren that she dearly loved in her own quiet way.  She wasn't the kind of grandmother who took the kids to Opryland (actually they didn't have that on either side, but all their grandparents cared for them very much) but she baked them goodies and visited them and kept an eye on them and probably went to graduations and things like that, I don't remember.  She also kept a lot of other relatives, like me. 

She, like Granny, had a portrait of a handsome young man I never had the privilege to know, my uncle Olie.  His death at age 18 was one of those events you see in movies, where a local teenager gets really sick (or has an accident or gets shot or... you get the picture) and dies young and the whole town shuts down for the funeral.  But before I knew all that about the town's reaction, I knew that my grandmother and all her family lost a dear brother, son, grandson, and uncle.  I guess because he didn't live long enough to have children and grandchildren of his own, I felt sort of obligated to keep his memory alive.  I think others in my family might've felt that way too.  For example, my uncle Lanny put a new headstone on Olie's grave.  Lanny was just a little fella when Olie died; I think he was about 3.

These are just a few of the stories I'd like to share, as well as some of the fictional characters I've created over the years.  Some of my characters are loosely based on real people and real events, but in general most are purely made up.  Here's an example of that:  I used to wonder what it would've been like if Lorene and her first husband had adopted a child, or had a baby late in life. Everette was only in his early 40s when he died, so he would've died very early in this baby's life.  I came up with a lot of good stories and characters from that "what if" story. Many of my stories are "what ifs" or at least they start out that way.  I do a lot of research into the past to find details and ideas.  Like looking at Olie's death certificate and obituary. 

I need to be looking at the inside of my eyelids.  Gotta go make that money while it's there.

Two can be as bad as one, it's the loneliest number since the number one...

I'd planned to use this post to document my progress on the "40 bags in 40 days" project for Lent.  You know, 40 bags of decluttering... however, I've been working a lot!  I didn't do any decluttering on Ash Wednesday because I went to Randy's mom's house for dinner, but I DID clean up Sonny's bathroom and that WAS one bag of trash.

On Day 2 of Lent I cleaned off the bathroom counter.  Photos to come later.  Three bags resulted from that - one trash bag and two smaller gift bags, one for each child.

I went back to work after all the snow on Friday, and then worked in home health Friday night.  I worked Saturday morning and evening, and in between I went to Nashville and took back the rental car and finally got my car back, went to eat with Randy, his mom, his sister and her friend, and went to the karaoke pizza place.  Today I worked in the morning, napped awhile in the afternoon, and have been lazy, watching TV and playing online since.  So I guess I'm three days behind, because I really shouldn't count all three bags from Thursday.

Well... that's all I've got to say about that, so far.  More later...

One more time for all of the old times!

Yesterday I worked in home health and in my free time (and afterward) I did some karaoke "hopping."  My first stop was Knight's Pizza in Greenbrier.  They need a web page!  Hey, if y'all are reading this and you need a web page, let me know by posting a reply to this post and I will get you started cheap! 

The next place I went, after work, was CJ's Grille in White House. These folks need a web page too, but they DO have a Facebook page.  I put the other link in just because I know not everybody does Facebook.  For that matter there are still a few people who don't use the Internet all the time like I do. 

All that singing had me in a great mood going from my first patient's house to my second and going home too, although by then the singing was over because the voice was tired.  Of course I really enjoy doing home health, but some days the driving gets tedious and occasionally I am in a lot of pain from beginning to end and sometimes the next day as well. 

Today there was church and then dinner at Logan's in Clarksville.  Since then it's been a day for curling up on the couch and halfway watching a movie with Randy (Machete Kills - wouldn't have been my choice, but it's got a huge cast and it's somewhat entertaining.  I would rate it NC17 for violence and language, but it's certainly not boring.). It's cold and rainy here, and we've just begun to get thunder.  Thunder snows are rare.  I haven't heard any sleet, but hopefully it will just go straight to 3 or 4 inches of snow and we won't have any of this "wintry mix" we keep hearing about.

The first time I remember hearing thunder when it was snowing was when I was almost 11.  Mom was very, very pregnant with Garner and that winter had been particularly bad.  It was 1978,one of those years we ran out of snow days and some of those snows were over six inches.  It was a sort of scary afternoon, and we needed our clothes washed, and we didn't have a washer and dryer in our apartment so we got in the VW and went to the laundromat in Greenbrier.  (Now, there is a laundromat within walking distance!)  Dad came up there looking for us because we weren't home and the weather was horrible.  Everything was all right.  We were just hurrying to get everything done so we could get home out of the elements.  By the way, the website I used for that 1978 link is pretty cool.  One can easily compare the data from the past to the future to see if they still believe in global warming, or just to prove that yes, dear, we did get deeper snows and more of them in the '70s.  Don't ask me why.

Here's a healthcare funny I might share with my students.  What if the doctor wore the johnny?

you might think I'm delirious...

Oh, it was back in the day.  Way, way back in the day... a lot of water's gone under the bridge since then - the Prince Green bridge, or its predecessor, which I hit in my big old land barge Catalina - and I am reliving it tonight on Facebook.  I heard this song the other day and I would've posted on Tim Horn's wall how this reminded me of going to Ridgecrest, but I had posted a link to "PYT" on Tim's wall the day before and God knows I don't need anybody thinking I'm fooling around with somebody because I posted songs from 1984 on their Facebook wall.

I normally don't like to think about 1984 much, and especially not this time of the year and now, my baby is starting HIS senior year and I know exactly how many years it's been (do the math!  there's a teacher answer for you).  But for some reason, this year has mellowed my memory of 1984 and I can deal with the ugly memories... most of them anyway.  The ones I don't like to remember are the ugly ones caused by me.  The other not-so-pretty memories, well, they are what they are and at least I still have them.

Summer's about over for me.  We had open house at school tonight.  Down here in the extremely hot South we send our kids back to school in the heat of August so we can spend a ton of money on air conditioning (and believe you me, we need our air conditioning in our schools without windows).  It gets earlier and earlier too, although I will say that the August 7 start date is a few days later than the August 4 start date we had my first year in our neighboring county to the east-northeast.  Usually, we get out in mid- to late- May and that makes coming in from bus duty soaked with sweat a little more worthwhile.

Every year I say I'm going to be a little tougher than I was the year before, and every year I end up being a pushover.  I don't want to be meaner than I ought to be, but I don't want to be a pushover, either.  I'm praying and honestly, at the moment, I feel like I'll be all right.  I know I can make it.  I know I can handle it.

I do know that one thing I need to do, in order to make it, is to go to bed and get some well-deserved rest.

you better stop and smell the roses

I wish I could smell today. I am congested. I dreamed that I was congested, & when I woke up, I knew why. So, we stayed home from church. We weren't planning a trip to see the family this afternoon because Mom had plans. She was planning to either celebrate my sister-in-law's birthday with her family, or her brother's birthday with his.

We didn't get invited to either of those. I didn't expect to be invited to my sister-in-law's family dinner. Randy's mom doesn't invite my brother & his family to Randy's birthday dinner (though I'm sure they'd be welcome). As for Mom's brother's big surprise blow-out (which is going on right now, so it's not a surprise anymore), I think they all believe we live SO FAR AWAY that we wouldn't be able to come. I tell myself this, so I won't think it's because they just don't want us around. Really, though, I think it's more like what I said. We live 25 miles away - only about 250 feet from the very county in which they live. I drive further than that to work every day. But because I don't live under foot in Ridgetop, I might as well still live in Kentucky, like I did FOURTEEN YEARS AGO.

As it turned out, I had a cold today anyway. Instead of rushing around today, wearing myself out, I'm taking a day of rest, hoping to feel better tomorrow when I hit the ground running & go back to work. Yesterday the whole family went to eat at the Blackhorse in Clarksville (half courtesy of Jostens, who gave a gift card as a Bingo prize at the employee picnic last week), then Rachel & I went shopping for awhile, until I got a blister on my foot. She & I were both tired & stressed by the time we got home. She spent the night with her friend Ashley, Derek spent the evening with his new Xbox 360 (which, I am proud to say, he sold other games, etc. to pay for!), & Randy laid on the bed watching TV while I watched "ER" & burned some Elvis stuff I had on TiVo to DVD for my personal collection. I just love the 70's concert with the light blue jumpsuit.

So, I guess I'd better get up & do some stuff to get my week organized. Fortunately, this week should be slightly easier than most because the kids are out of school & Randy's off work part of the week. If I can organize the household chores so that the house doesn't get too dirty & the clothes stay washed, then maybe the kids (Rachel, at least) can help with dinner, & maybe I won't be spending tons of money all the time. Of course, this means the kids will be eating me out of house & home...but not costing me as much in lunch money.

Later!

are you proud to be a War Eagle?

The next line in the cheer is, "Yes, we are." The War Eagles of Sycamore HS did not do such a pride-inspiring job last night, getting beat really, really bad by Pearl-Cohn. But the homecoming ceremonies were beautiful & fun.

I do not have pictures of the homecoming ceremony yet but here is a photo of Rachel & her escort (& her daddy, behind the wheel) in the parade on Monday. She looks like she is leading a cheer. She is not a cheerleader! We did that back in the elementary school days.

Mom came to the game & I thought she looked really good - healthier than she has in a long time. She didn't stay for the game. She didn't miss much there. I stayed because by the time we got through the National Anthem it was 7:30, & there was no point in going back to Greenbrier to get there after the visitation period ended. Besides, a boy from our church was part of the halftime festivities, & his family was sitting right behind us. I'm sure they would've understood if we left after Rachel's portion, but like I said, at that point, it didn't make much sense to leave.

We go back to the funeral home at 12 today. It just seemed unreal until we got there. In a way I thought, no, they were calling us about the wrong person. Someone else died. It wasn't her. They will call us & tell us it was someone else. But no, it was really her. She didn't look like herself, but she looked peaceful, & better than she did the last time we saw her.

I read with great joy the report of Carla's daughter Annie being restored to health. Praise God! As a health care professional, I struggle with the knowledge that sometimes the very medications we use to heal can actually harm. It is such a fine line.

Though I bear no malice toward anyone for Granny's passing - she is home & at peace - I can't help but think those pain medications accelerated the process. Her taking them at home led to the fall that led to the hospitalization that led to the "temporary" nursing home placement. Did those people give her more than she needed? If they did, I believe it was because they wanted her to be free from pain. I know it is hard to see someone hurt. I know she did not want to be in pain.

When Randy's dad died, it was a similar situation. He was sick a long time, but he, like Granny, had an infection for which they gave antibiotics & pain medication. They gave him too much pain medicine, & his breathing suffered, & his condition deteriorated rapidly. My other Granny died after a year of taking huge doses of Prednisone & having every side effect in the PDR. Medicine is a great thing, but it cannot do everything. On the other hand, God can.

Tonight's the night we'll make history

Tonight is the 22nd anniversary of my high school graduation. I doubt very seriously I'll make history tonight, but I imagine that everyone who attended my graduation remembers it well.

That afternoon there came a big storm. The lights were off all over Greenbrier. I had to be at the school at a certain time, probably 4 o'clock or so, & I got the first shower of the evening. Just after that, the water heater broke. So, when I left the house, I wasn't sure if any of my family would be there to see me graduate.

When I got to the school the power was off. Mr. Evetts, the vice principal (also known as "Rabbit") said we might have to reschedule until the next day. John Elmore, a big football player (& now an assistant football coach there) towered over him & said, "No, I have reservations in Florida tomorrow night, & I'm going down there with my diploma."

Well, my family made it, we graduated, John went to Florida, & the lights came on - just as they called my name. I'll bet a couple of people might even remember that too. I got a big cheer.

I am so glad that Jesus loves me

I just have that song on my mind. It's true, but it's not one of my old favorite hymns or anything. Those would be songs like "Victory in Jesus," "There is a Fountain," "Blessed Assurance," & "To God Be the Glory."

I am at Brittany's graduation party. We go to Jessica's next. Randy brought his cornhole game. We spent so much time last summer trying to find that, then I think we've played it once.

We're almost to Jessica's party now. Randy left the cornhole game at Amy's. I won't go there. I had fun, though.

I'm feeling like my blood's made of molasses today. Party food. Well, that's all I have for today. Maybe more later.

Sent via BlackBerry from Cingular Wireless

It's been such a long time

But in a way, it seems like just yesterday when I stuck my head in the labor & delivery room at Nashville Memorial Hospital to visit my cousin Kenny & his wife (at the time) as they awaited the birth of their daughter Jessica. I didn't get to be there for the birth, just for a quick visit between school at Vandy & my job at the drug store.

Jess is officially a graduate of Greenbrier High School tonight. Though we didn't get to go, I'll be seeing them all Saturday night at the graduation party.

On another busy day that same year, Randy became an uncle. His niece, Brittany, graduates tomorrow afternoon.

Just before that, in the same gym, our neighbor Jessie will also graduate. Their final choir performance last week brought me to tears. He's kind of like one of mine.

It is hard to believe I am that old!

Tonight I stood in the front of the church with a microphone again. I was practicing for my "comeback" this Sunday. I started to warm up to it. I think I can get used to it pretty quick.

It is truly my desire to sing in front of people again. And I have no desire to sing anything but gospel music. I fear getting to a point where I can't sing. But, if Mary Tom Speer can still do it (and do it well!), maybe I still have a few good years left in me.

The Rock Star is playing tomorrow & Saturday. Tonight he's loafing with the boys. Last night he hung around with us, & he will tomorrow as well, during the day at least.

I have to go - got to sleep & find the request for the mammogram I'm scheduled for in the morning. And I forgot to have my films sent from Skyline! Eek! Well, I'm sure that can be done later. I haven't had time to pick them up anyway.

Never say goodbye.

Tonight I'm going to wax nostalgic for a bit.

You see, here in Middle Tennessee, a unique and special man is leaving the airwaves, signing off after 41 years on the air. Well, maybe he was actually on air somewhere before 1967, but he's been at NewsChannel 5 since 1966. His name is Chris Clark.

Chris Clark has been at Channel 5 ALL MY LIFE. Not that the man is old. He is 68, but he looks like he's got plenty of years left. One of my co-workers said, "I remember when he came to Channel 5." I said, "I don't." Other news reporters have come & gone. The "competition," WSMV, Channel 4, has been home to John Tesh & Pat Sajak. Chris himself hired a young Oprah Winfrey. On the Channel 5 website, it says he is the longest-running anchor in Channel 5 history. Well, DUH! I wonder how many news reporters ANYWHERE have lasted at one station longer than 41 years. Not many, I would wager.

Here is an excerpt (well, most of) the e-mail I sent to Chris:

I was born in Nashville in 1967 & have lived in the Channel 5 Viewing Area
my entire life - in Ridgetop, Goodlettsville, Greenbrier, Clarksville, & Pleasant View. When I was 22 & moved to Madisonville, KY, I was so relieved to see that WTVF was on the local cable!!! My husband can vouch for the fact that when I was homesick, I would watch Channel 5 just to get a little dose of home. (Although I was known to cry at the sight of a Tennessee Pride sausage commercial. Something about tasting the sunrise, I guess.)

Chris, you have been one of the family. Your smiling face entered our living room every night at 6 sharp. When I was starting kindergarten my mom said, "You'll sit at a desk," & immediately I thought of Chris Clark & the news desk at Channel 5. Needless to say, I was a little disappointed when I got to school!

NewsChannel 5 without Chris Clark will be like fries without ketchup & cereal without milk - it'll still be NewsChannel 5 but it won't be the same!!!

Wishing you all life's blessings & especially a long, healthy & happy retirement!

I didn't share the story about my grandparents' dog, Dixie. She used to get excited at 10 pm every night because it was time for her evening treat. Granddaddy swore she could tell time because she would look at the clock. I countered that it was because she recognized Chris Clark's voice over the TV. Maybe we were both right.

There's not much I can say that hasn't already been said about this man who has, in my mind, been synonymous with Channel 5 and Nashville news in general. When I was a kid, I thought he was at least as knowledgeable & popular as Walter Cronkite; as a young adult, I realized he was only human & wasn't perfect about everything, but you have to say this for the man - a more dedicated newsman you'll never find. I mean, 41 years at one job! That says it all.

Best wishes, Chris - we'll see you then.

happy anniversary baby, got you on my mi-i-ind

Twenty years ago today Randy & I became a couple. Oh, wait a minute. That would be 20 years ago yesterday, now...it's officially 4/29 here. But it's 4/28 somewhere. Anyway, as is usually the case on anniversaries, only one of us is home - tonight it's me. Randy is being a Cheatham County Rock Star at one of his Cheatham County classmates' birthday party. The 40th. Yes, I know. It is rapidly - very rapidly - approaching. If the gap between this blog & the next is as long as the one between this one & the last, I'll be 40 when I blog again.

I went out & spent a bunch of money today buying shoes. It's sales-tax-free weekend, for clothing & school supplies anyway. (Here in TN we normally pay a rather exorbitant sales tax on everything, including food.) I was NOT the only person who had the idea to shop today. The mall was jam-packed. I won't go into all the horrible things I saw there - suffice it to say that when we finally made our purchase, I was good & ready to get out of there.

This week has gone by quickly & it has been somewhat eventful. I pulled some strings & got the results of my CPAP titration done a few weeks ago. I am waiting on the doctor's office to get me my very own machine with all the bells & whistles, but meanwhile I am using Randy's old one. I love the Internet. Using it, I learned how to reset the machine so it's on MY pressure instead of Randy's. I know some people hate the things & I do have my middle-of-the-night moments when I can't get comfortable with it, but the very next day I saw a huge difference, & I really see a lot of improvement already. The next morning on my way to work I not only didn't have to fight sleep, but I actually noticed things I'd never paid attention to before!!! Now, granted, I need to discipline myself to get enough TIME to sleep right now...that's my plan for TOMORROW night. Yeah, famous last words, I know. But tomorrow between morning church & evening church I will be here watching the Talladega race (Sterling starts 4th!!! First time in a long time he's been that close to the pole!!!) - hopefully for the whole thing - & that will be a good time to rest up - & maybe finish up my laundry before this rather eventful upcoming week.

One afternoon this week I got an e-mail from a fellow named Barry who went to school with me & as it turns out way back (at least 7 generations ago) there are some family connections. Now, where we grew up, I always heard most of us in Ridgetop & Greenbrier were "kin" but now I am starting to believe it. I couldn't believe all the names I recognized in his family tree. He's a descendant of one of the founders of Ridgetop. My family's been there for at least 7 generations (really, I think most of them were around before the town became a town). His ancestor married into one of the families I came from.

I used to be really into the collection of family history, but most of the time the present day takes most of my time & attention. And sometimes, the future does too. Truthfully, I started writing these things down & looking this stuff up because (1) I want the future generations of our family to have this information in case they need it & (2) I just have a lot of fun digging up old records, looking at old newspapers on microfilm, & stuff like that. Every now & then I might dig out a folder & look through, or if someone in the family passes away I might copy the obit or something, but I haven't done much serious searching in years. I suppose I got tagged the family historian because I spent a lot of time hanging out with my grandmother, who lived across the road from the old homeplace, & I knew all the old folks in the family when my cousins my age didn't. Anyway, this week I've corresponded with Barry a few times & have learned a lot I didn't know about that branch of the family. There's a lot to learn yet - though I am in no hurry, I kind of like getting more info as it trickles in. That way it's not boring. The best part about that has been catching up.

Wednesday night I went to a nuclear medicine educational meeting in Nashville after work - so glad I wasn't fighting sleep - & that gave me time to catch up with my friend Cindy. This coming weekend we have another nuc med meeting to go to, & that should be fun too.

Thursday night Rachel had a piano lesson, then on Friday she had a recital, which I baked about 100 pigs in blankets for. So, yes, it's been quite an eventful week. I am ever so thankful for the CPAP. It is definitely a blessing. No way I could've made it through 2 trips through the mall, a trip to my grandmother's in Greenbrier, shopping in Springfield, & doing some laundry here at home today without it.

Well, it is really, really late so I am gonna hit the hay - & the CPAP. More later, sometime, maybe.

It's just another day.

I feel like using the title, "Nothing happened in Greenbrier today." I don't have any idea if anything happened in Greenbrier today. I spent my day in Clarksville. It was just another day. I had a pretty light schedule. It was a beautiful day, for sure. It was about 65 degrees (unlike yesterday when we had record-low temps), sunny, really nice. I went out to pay some bills at lunch. I got off at a decent hour. I took Rachel to her piano lesson. I sat in the Baptist church parking lot & read some of "Flood." That's about it. Pretty ordinary, but it has been a great day.

Let's see...what is happening in my life that might be newsworthy...oh! I've decided to put the Chauncey Almanac on Blogger too. I will be sure to add that to my blog roll when I get it done.

Later!!!

A change will do you good.

And change will do me good too. I have typed this post three times. So, if there are three posts just alike, bear with me until I can fix the problem.

I didn't work today. It was the first day of my mini-vacation. I didn't do much here either. I washed some clothes, & folded some, I called the orthodontist's office, I talked to the insurance man, I walked the dog, I cooked & cleaned up after myself, & I moved some stuff from the living room into the kitchen to prepare for the great floor project coming up this weekend. But mostly, I loafed today.

I have a yearbook on loan from one of my friends. It's the 1975 Bobcat of Greenbrier - whoops, I almost forgot, it's from the years when Greenbrier the town was going through an identity crisis & the name became Green Brier - High School. I was in second grade then. All the kids in the book were the big grownups at the high school. Well, now I have a child in high school myself, & one not too far behind. I don't feel sad about that.

I do feel sad when I realize that I have wasted so much time. I'm almost 40. I can't keep wasting time looking for a career change that I don't really want to make. For a long time I thought I wanted to do something different like reflexology, but I know now that's not for me. I spent hours & hours (& sometimes dollars) searching for schools, for therapies, for treatments, for nutrition information, exercise information & plans, & the like. I got diabetes anyway, probably because I spent so much time on my butt in front of the computer. I don't even remember what got me interested in holistic health. Well, I do sort of...it's been a long process.

I tried getting into side jobs, and that didn't work. Too much busy work & not enough payoff. I have spent far too many hours looking for others' opinions on simplicity & Biblical matters like modesty & how to wear my hair & child rearing. I haven't spent nearly enough time reading God's Word for His thoughts on those matters.

I'm not really taking a sabbatical. I will still do some writing & hopefully even make some improvements to my web pages. I might look up a recipe or two. But this looking to the Internet for answers for everything has to stop. I just don't have the time anymore. I probably never did. Instead I'm going to use my time, however long I have, whether it's 80 more years or 8 more minutes, to be a blessing to other people. I'm sure I'll be blessed - I always have been.