A couple years ago, I subscribed to Newspapers.com, which is really entertaining and wonderful for a trivia and history buff such as myself. Maybe we aren't supposed to remember all the people who died in the past, but there were lots of characters who have gotten lost in all the information out there these days. I wrote about some of them back in March and there are many others I could write about.
So, starting today (this is post 1 of 2 today), my blog is getting a new life. It's slow time at work now, the time of year when I have to look for work to get enough to pay the bills. Off the clock, my life is changing slowly, but changing none the less, and it may result in my having more time to devote to my already-existing side jobs of CPR instruction and writing non-fiction with a few fictional stories here and there.
Our 26-year-old daughter is moving home at some point in the next few months, and as I'm cleaning out our son's old bedroom to let her bring in her stuff, I'm moving things around and getting rid of things that mean nothing to me. There's plenty of that. I'm a packrat, not really to hoarder status because I have paths through all the rooms (LOL) but... just getting rid of things that I'm not attached to is working pretty well for now. A new storage unit business has been opened just down the road from us, and after the "bug man" comes, I'm going to rent one for her extra stuff and my CPR business storage. Since it's right down the road, it'll be easy to grab things as I go, kind of like I do from my garage now. But when the garage gets cleaned out... that'll give us more room too.
When we moved in here, we never dreamed we'd still be here 25 years later. Heck, we only had one baby and she was a toddler! We didn't even know there'd be a boy joining us in about 18 months! Things have changed a lot, mostly in the amount of crap we've managed to cram into this place. It became too small the day I moved the crib into the "storage room" so that boy would have a room of his own. I was never a great housekeeper, but when we got a dog who destroyed carpet and furniture, I was overwhelmed. I got depressed. Then we got computers that opened us up to all kinds of information and entertainment, so I became an even worse housekeeper. The kids weren't much help. We got more animals, then gradually they died out. By this time I wasn't working 40 hours a week or driving and working, I was teaching and driving so I never had any free time whatsoever to work on the house. When I went back to nucs and the kids were in college or on their own, I was physically just barely able to work and function, and I was scared of mice coming out of cabinets and closets that needed cleaning. I got two more cats, but physically I'm still not doing that great. I'm gradually getting better by making some changes that I won't go into here, but I'm looking forward to having more energy and if I can get the house cleaned up a little more (and I am getting there), writing will be easier because I won't feel like I should be doing something else instead!
Showing posts with label home. Show all posts
Showing posts with label home. Show all posts
Friday, August 17, 2018
Tuesday, March 27, 2018
One of these nights...
One of these nights I'm gonna write something absolutely amazing and powerful and I'm really looking forward to it.
So far, I haven't figured out what that is, exactly... but I'm okay with that. I'll keep on writing until I do.
I'd love to write more, and really, I DO write more than I post on this blog because I prefer not to just throw everything I think onto a blog like a diary for everyone in the universe to read. I work a lot, and I love what I do 99.44% of the time but I would love to have more time to write. I spend too much time trying to make money. Well, I might as well while I'm able and my kids aren't little anymore so that I can retire before I die. I tell people I write every chance I get but it's really not true. If it were true, I'd have a lot more material to read. I have many, many stories in my head that I really should put into writing, because I know I'm not going to live forever (at least not in this realm, and I'm not sure how much of my brain will make it through the life I'm living now) and I don't want the stories and characters to die with me. After I'm gone my kids can pass this stuff on to other people, or just give them away, but hopefully, I'll get some of them out into the world and let the universe decide whether they're worth keeping.
There were also people who once walked this earth and not just through my brain whose stories shouldn't be forgotten either. Those who passed after about 2005 will have more information about them on the Internet for future generations than those who passed before that, and there are stories in the old newspapers and databases for those who wish to look for those folks. Still there are people who lived quiet and simple lives, whose stories weren't compelling Nicholas Sparks novel fodder (or even Lifetime movie fodder), who've left serious marks on the manuscript of my own life. My grandmother was one... one of her father's seventeen children as well as one of her mother's eleven. Her oldest sister Lorene was evidently unable to bear children of her own, but I never, ever heard her complain about that, or talk about it at all. I never asked her why she didn't have children, maybe because I was afraid to bring it up. Her husband had lost two children in the Christmas Eve crash that claimed his first wife and left him with only his son. Maybe she figured it might've been better to have had no children at all. His son gave her four step-grandchildren that she dearly loved in her own quiet way. She wasn't the kind of grandmother who took the kids to Opryland (actually they didn't have that on either side, but all their grandparents cared for them very much) but she baked them goodies and visited them and kept an eye on them and probably went to graduations and things like that, I don't remember. She also kept a lot of other relatives, like me.
She, like Granny, had a portrait of a handsome young man I never had the privilege to know, my uncle Olie. His death at age 18 was one of those events you see in movies, where a local teenager gets really sick (or has an accident or gets shot or... you get the picture) and dies young and the whole town shuts down for the funeral. But before I knew all that about the town's reaction, I knew that my grandmother and all her family lost a dear brother, son, grandson, and uncle. I guess because he didn't live long enough to have children and grandchildren of his own, I felt sort of obligated to keep his memory alive. I think others in my family might've felt that way too. For example, my uncle Lanny put a new headstone on Olie's grave. Lanny was just a little fella when Olie died; I think he was about 3.
These are just a few of the stories I'd like to share, as well as some of the fictional characters I've created over the years. Some of my characters are loosely based on real people and real events, but in general most are purely made up. Here's an example of that: I used to wonder what it would've been like if Lorene and her first husband had adopted a child, or had a baby late in life. Everette was only in his early 40s when he died, so he would've died very early in this baby's life. I came up with a lot of good stories and characters from that "what if" story. Many of my stories are "what ifs" or at least they start out that way. I do a lot of research into the past to find details and ideas. Like looking at Olie's death certificate and obituary.
I need to be looking at the inside of my eyelids. Gotta go make that money while it's there.
So far, I haven't figured out what that is, exactly... but I'm okay with that. I'll keep on writing until I do.
I'd love to write more, and really, I DO write more than I post on this blog because I prefer not to just throw everything I think onto a blog like a diary for everyone in the universe to read. I work a lot, and I love what I do 99.44% of the time but I would love to have more time to write. I spend too much time trying to make money. Well, I might as well while I'm able and my kids aren't little anymore so that I can retire before I die. I tell people I write every chance I get but it's really not true. If it were true, I'd have a lot more material to read. I have many, many stories in my head that I really should put into writing, because I know I'm not going to live forever (at least not in this realm, and I'm not sure how much of my brain will make it through the life I'm living now) and I don't want the stories and characters to die with me. After I'm gone my kids can pass this stuff on to other people, or just give them away, but hopefully, I'll get some of them out into the world and let the universe decide whether they're worth keeping.
There were also people who once walked this earth and not just through my brain whose stories shouldn't be forgotten either. Those who passed after about 2005 will have more information about them on the Internet for future generations than those who passed before that, and there are stories in the old newspapers and databases for those who wish to look for those folks. Still there are people who lived quiet and simple lives, whose stories weren't compelling Nicholas Sparks novel fodder (or even Lifetime movie fodder), who've left serious marks on the manuscript of my own life. My grandmother was one... one of her father's seventeen children as well as one of her mother's eleven. Her oldest sister Lorene was evidently unable to bear children of her own, but I never, ever heard her complain about that, or talk about it at all. I never asked her why she didn't have children, maybe because I was afraid to bring it up. Her husband had lost two children in the Christmas Eve crash that claimed his first wife and left him with only his son. Maybe she figured it might've been better to have had no children at all. His son gave her four step-grandchildren that she dearly loved in her own quiet way. She wasn't the kind of grandmother who took the kids to Opryland (actually they didn't have that on either side, but all their grandparents cared for them very much) but she baked them goodies and visited them and kept an eye on them and probably went to graduations and things like that, I don't remember. She also kept a lot of other relatives, like me.
She, like Granny, had a portrait of a handsome young man I never had the privilege to know, my uncle Olie. His death at age 18 was one of those events you see in movies, where a local teenager gets really sick (or has an accident or gets shot or... you get the picture) and dies young and the whole town shuts down for the funeral. But before I knew all that about the town's reaction, I knew that my grandmother and all her family lost a dear brother, son, grandson, and uncle. I guess because he didn't live long enough to have children and grandchildren of his own, I felt sort of obligated to keep his memory alive. I think others in my family might've felt that way too. For example, my uncle Lanny put a new headstone on Olie's grave. Lanny was just a little fella when Olie died; I think he was about 3.
These are just a few of the stories I'd like to share, as well as some of the fictional characters I've created over the years. Some of my characters are loosely based on real people and real events, but in general most are purely made up. Here's an example of that: I used to wonder what it would've been like if Lorene and her first husband had adopted a child, or had a baby late in life. Everette was only in his early 40s when he died, so he would've died very early in this baby's life. I came up with a lot of good stories and characters from that "what if" story. Many of my stories are "what ifs" or at least they start out that way. I do a lot of research into the past to find details and ideas. Like looking at Olie's death certificate and obituary.
I need to be looking at the inside of my eyelids. Gotta go make that money while it's there.
Sunday, August 02, 2015
Working for a living...
So tonight I'm sitting here halfway watching TV and halfway working. I need to figure out how much work I need to do outside of my part-time jobs this week. But Hee Haw is on! That's actually pretty good inspiration for working on webpages. I'm doing nukes tomorrow. I've got a doctor appointment Tuesday and then working afterward, then all day Wednesday, and teaching CPR the end of the week in Springfield and at Vandy. This is my "audition" with Vandy so I hope I "pass."
I figure blogging is a good start to my workweek.
Tonight's the weekly Arbonne sales call for our team. I have asked two people to host for me in the last 2 days, 3 really, but 2 are hosting together. They scheduled a date for me, next month, but that's all right... better than no date at all. The third didn't, yet, but maybe soon. I'm going to make some ads to put on my pages. I don't like to work too much on Sundays... I think we all need to rest one day a week if we can.
I'm pushing the 80/20 rule on eating. I'm only following about 50/50 right now! No, maybe 60/40. I'm working at it. I went to the Y in Clarksville today and that was a good thing.
I figure blogging is a good start to my workweek.
Tonight's the weekly Arbonne sales call for our team. I have asked two people to host for me in the last 2 days, 3 really, but 2 are hosting together. They scheduled a date for me, next month, but that's all right... better than no date at all. The third didn't, yet, but maybe soon. I'm going to make some ads to put on my pages. I don't like to work too much on Sundays... I think we all need to rest one day a week if we can.
I'm pushing the 80/20 rule on eating. I'm only following about 50/50 right now! No, maybe 60/40. I'm working at it. I went to the Y in Clarksville today and that was a good thing.
Monday, February 16, 2015
Ice, ice, baby... Too cold, too cold
Sitting in a motel room because I'm sort of stuck in Nashville because it's icy. It's kind of nice. I've been lying around and watching a marathon of "My Big Fat Fabulous Life." My life is boring. Lol. Not really...
Since I last posted a lot has changed. Most notably, I've changed jobs. I'm a PRN tech for Vanderbilt Heart. Hence I'm stuck in icy Nashville instead of home using snow days. I still sub sometimes, though the pay's not great, because I need extra money, but I do get paid more than I did as a full-time teacher.
It would take all night to write about the last year. Sonny died in August. In December we got two pound kitties, Ivy and Josie. Ivy has just started allowing us to pet her this month. Josie's not there yet. They're cute and energetic. They're a lot of fun.
I'd like to start blogging again. I've finally got all the classes out of the way for the masters degree. I've got the credential so now I need to use it. I just have a hard time managing my time. That's one of my lent goals- I'm giving up computer games/puzzles. I'm not giving up the computer, because the time waster is Spider Solitaire and the puzzles are sort of a gateway drug. So maybe when I don't have that to eat up my night, I can do more writing. I hope so anyway.
Sunday, March 09, 2014
Two can be as bad as one, it's the loneliest number since the number one...
I'd planned to use this post to document my progress on the "40 bags in 40 days" project for Lent. You know, 40 bags of decluttering... however, I've been working a lot! I didn't do any decluttering on Ash Wednesday because I went to Randy's mom's house for dinner, but I DID clean up Sonny's bathroom and that WAS one bag of trash.
On Day 2 of Lent I cleaned off the bathroom counter. Photos to come later. Three bags resulted from that - one trash bag and two smaller gift bags, one for each child.
I went back to work after all the snow on Friday, and then worked in home health Friday night. I worked Saturday morning and evening, and in between I went to Nashville and took back the rental car and finally got my car back, went to eat with Randy, his mom, his sister and her friend, and went to the karaoke pizza place. Today I worked in the morning, napped awhile in the afternoon, and have been lazy, watching TV and playing online since. So I guess I'm three days behind, because I really shouldn't count all three bags from Thursday.
Well... that's all I've got to say about that, so far. More later...
On Day 2 of Lent I cleaned off the bathroom counter. Photos to come later. Three bags resulted from that - one trash bag and two smaller gift bags, one for each child.
I went back to work after all the snow on Friday, and then worked in home health Friday night. I worked Saturday morning and evening, and in between I went to Nashville and took back the rental car and finally got my car back, went to eat with Randy, his mom, his sister and her friend, and went to the karaoke pizza place. Today I worked in the morning, napped awhile in the afternoon, and have been lazy, watching TV and playing online since. So I guess I'm three days behind, because I really shouldn't count all three bags from Thursday.
Well... that's all I've got to say about that, so far. More later...
Sunday, March 24, 2013
I'm not Lisa. My name is Julie.
My name is not Julie. Nor was the woman's singing this song - that would've been Jessi Colter, the undeniably hot wife (now widow) of Waylon Jennings. My really pretty stepsister looks a lot like a young Jessi, to me. Yes, I am a little jealous - Jessi was hot, but also extremely cool. Still is, really.
That link will take you to a YouTube video of her singing on "Hee Haw" and, of course, if you know me, you'll know I've written a bunch of stuff about that show.
I didn't start this post with the intention of writing about Jessi Colter. I wanted to write about someone named Julie, Julie London. She was another hot but extremely cool lady. Yes, I really AM heterosexual. I promise. But when you're a kid, you often admire the beautiful women in your life and in front of you on the TV. I haven't forgotten this!
With this sort of mindset, the other morning I was fighting the urge to go back to sleep. The night before, I'd been up late and I read the IMDb profile I linked above, and I thought, I really need to watch some "Emergency." So that morning when I was dragging, I thought, "What would Dixie McCall do?" Dixie, of course, was the name of Julie's character, the unflappable, consummate ER nurse who was, in my humble opinion, perfect for the job. She stood up for others, whether they be the patient or a co-worker, whenever necessary. She offered a listening ear or a hand to hold. She was efficient and professional, caring and yet direct. She was smart and always knew what to do. I still want to be Dixie when I grow up.
What would Dixie have done that early morning? Why, she'd have gotten up and made a pot of coffee and gotten down to business! I could've made a pot of coffee, but I've been drinking tea more lately. I had a jug in the kitchen, so I poured myself a big glass and got on with my day. I had an observation that day. I don't know yet how it went (my meeting is tomorrow) but I felt cool, calm, unflappable, and interesting. I created a meme and put it on my desktop both at home and work, and even printed a copy for my desk at work:
You may copy it... I don't remember where the picture came from either so I deserve no credit. It's good to have it. I sat down here awhile ago and I saw that picture and I thought... Dixie would sit here and do her lesson plans!
Of course I sat here and wrote this post instead... but I'll get to work on those lesson plans right away. I just had to share this with my "fans." (tee, hee... these probably never get read!)
That link will take you to a YouTube video of her singing on "Hee Haw" and, of course, if you know me, you'll know I've written a bunch of stuff about that show.
I didn't start this post with the intention of writing about Jessi Colter. I wanted to write about someone named Julie, Julie London. She was another hot but extremely cool lady. Yes, I really AM heterosexual. I promise. But when you're a kid, you often admire the beautiful women in your life and in front of you on the TV. I haven't forgotten this!
With this sort of mindset, the other morning I was fighting the urge to go back to sleep. The night before, I'd been up late and I read the IMDb profile I linked above, and I thought, I really need to watch some "Emergency." So that morning when I was dragging, I thought, "What would Dixie McCall do?" Dixie, of course, was the name of Julie's character, the unflappable, consummate ER nurse who was, in my humble opinion, perfect for the job. She stood up for others, whether they be the patient or a co-worker, whenever necessary. She offered a listening ear or a hand to hold. She was efficient and professional, caring and yet direct. She was smart and always knew what to do. I still want to be Dixie when I grow up.
What would Dixie have done that early morning? Why, she'd have gotten up and made a pot of coffee and gotten down to business! I could've made a pot of coffee, but I've been drinking tea more lately. I had a jug in the kitchen, so I poured myself a big glass and got on with my day. I had an observation that day. I don't know yet how it went (my meeting is tomorrow) but I felt cool, calm, unflappable, and interesting. I created a meme and put it on my desktop both at home and work, and even printed a copy for my desk at work:
Of course I sat here and wrote this post instead... but I'll get to work on those lesson plans right away. I just had to share this with my "fans." (tee, hee... these probably never get read!)
Sunday, March 17, 2013
Someday, lady, you'll accomp'ny me
I could've sworn I used this post title before... but I couldn't find it. Doesn't matter. I have had this song in my mind the last few days, and then I got "Roll Me Away," because it, too, was in my head. I didn't really understand the feeling of wanting to just go back then, when those songs came out. Now I do. I wish I could've driven off and kept driving during my spring break. It's OK though. I did some different things last week after I got my medical stuff out of the way. I had a fairly normal ultrasound, a cavity filled, blood work that I still haven't heard about... and then I moved a bunch of furniture from Mom's house and moved some out of here. I rented a booth at an antique mall and a storage bin in Pleasant View. Life is pretty good, I think. I hope I feel the same way tomorrow after school.
Monday, March 11, 2013
'Cause we live in a time when meaning falls in splinters from our lives
Today has been a hard day.
It has been a month now, and I can't say it makes sense yet. I feel terrible, like somehow I let her down by not being able to keep her alive. She wanted to live, so badly. And yet I know that she wouldn't want to come back now. She suffered so much. I think she just got so tired.
I miss her. I wish I could have kept her with me for the rest of my life, but only if she was healthy and enjoying life, and not having to go through all that chemo and radiation. I thought about that occasionally, like what if we were out on a Sunday afternoon and had an accident and went together? But that's not the way it happened and for the family's sake, I know that's a good thing.
This experience has changed me and I'm not sure I like the way I have turned out, but I have learned a lot about myself in the past month.
I know that life is short. I have spent too much time playing cards and looking at silly blogs and tumblrs. I am going to use my spring break a little more wisely than I have in the past. I am going to declutter my house 15 minutes at a time. Yes, that's a FlyLady concept but please don't put me on the email list! I have to declutter my emails!!! :D
I know that life is short and we should do things we want to do and things we think will make a difference in the world, even if the difference seems small. I have searched my heart and my soul to figure out if I am headed in the right direction.
I have had to face some of my past, not that I have a lot of regrets, but I think we should learn from our past, and one mistake I have made over and over and over again is that I seem to never be happy. Is that why I can't get a nuclear medicine job in Nashville, because I have the reputation for never being content where I am? I know that's why I have such a dirty house, because I was never happy living here. I wanted to live in Ridgetop. Now, I don't have much reason to. Mom's gone, Grandaddy's gone, and Randy works 40 miles from there. This house is 17.5 miles from his work and 18.5 miles from mine... and I only work 10 months out of the year.
I like my car, though.
I may not always like teaching but I like my classroom. I could improve it, but I like it.
It's late and I have an appointment early. It may not ever make sense, but maybe I can be at peace with that.
It has been a month now, and I can't say it makes sense yet. I feel terrible, like somehow I let her down by not being able to keep her alive. She wanted to live, so badly. And yet I know that she wouldn't want to come back now. She suffered so much. I think she just got so tired.
I miss her. I wish I could have kept her with me for the rest of my life, but only if she was healthy and enjoying life, and not having to go through all that chemo and radiation. I thought about that occasionally, like what if we were out on a Sunday afternoon and had an accident and went together? But that's not the way it happened and for the family's sake, I know that's a good thing.
This experience has changed me and I'm not sure I like the way I have turned out, but I have learned a lot about myself in the past month.
I know that life is short. I have spent too much time playing cards and looking at silly blogs and tumblrs. I am going to use my spring break a little more wisely than I have in the past. I am going to declutter my house 15 minutes at a time. Yes, that's a FlyLady concept but please don't put me on the email list! I have to declutter my emails!!! :D
I know that life is short and we should do things we want to do and things we think will make a difference in the world, even if the difference seems small. I have searched my heart and my soul to figure out if I am headed in the right direction.
I have had to face some of my past, not that I have a lot of regrets, but I think we should learn from our past, and one mistake I have made over and over and over again is that I seem to never be happy. Is that why I can't get a nuclear medicine job in Nashville, because I have the reputation for never being content where I am? I know that's why I have such a dirty house, because I was never happy living here. I wanted to live in Ridgetop. Now, I don't have much reason to. Mom's gone, Grandaddy's gone, and Randy works 40 miles from there. This house is 17.5 miles from his work and 18.5 miles from mine... and I only work 10 months out of the year.
I like my car, though.
I may not always like teaching but I like my classroom. I could improve it, but I like it.
It's late and I have an appointment early. It may not ever make sense, but maybe I can be at peace with that.
Sunday, February 10, 2013
I will wait, I will wait for you...
I like this song. It's actually being performed on the Grammys right now. I am really out of touch most of the time but I like this song and these guys.
I have spent a lot of time waiting in the last few days. Waiting for Mom to take the next breath when she laid there on the bed breathing and then not breathing again for 15 or 20 seconds. She's been like this since Friday. I went home today because I needed to go home, I guess. I have cried and I have slept and I've eaten. My mind is shot... maybe my body is too, but it's probably better than my mind.
I suspect that my next journal entry will be describing the end of her journey. Maybe then I will be able to make sense of it all.
I have spent a lot of time waiting in the last few days. Waiting for Mom to take the next breath when she laid there on the bed breathing and then not breathing again for 15 or 20 seconds. She's been like this since Friday. I went home today because I needed to go home, I guess. I have cried and I have slept and I've eaten. My mind is shot... maybe my body is too, but it's probably better than my mind.
I suspect that my next journal entry will be describing the end of her journey. Maybe then I will be able to make sense of it all.
Saturday, December 01, 2012
Come fly away, let's fly, let's fly away...
Are you familiar with the FlyLady? I have been a fledgling off-and-on for awhile. I don't usually like adhering to a "system" unless it's something I've designed myself (for example, I go through my list every morning - I made it up one summer when I was having a hard time getting up at a "decent" hour and getting ready to go anywhere - for some reason I have no problem remembering "Tea, hair, meds, dress, teeth, eat, phone."). So, I've struggled with sticking to the FlyLady system too.
A lot of people who know me probably think I am fairly organized. Most of them might be surprised if they came to my house and saw it in the pigsty condition in which it usually stays. Many things have contributed to this. It started when I was working part-time at NorthCrest and I felt guilty because I didn't have my house clean all the time. Well, I guess really it started before that. I was "born organized" as FlyBabies say, but when I started dating Randy I discovered that one could survive while flying by the seat of the pants (Not to be confused with "FLYing.") not just where cleaning is concerned but in many other ways as well. A few years later I wanted to fill my house with more little ones - so I ended up with 3 cats and a dog - and my house got messier and messier. Then my health started interfering, where I couldn't stand up for long periods of time. And somewhere in there my work schedule started interfering too. Not only was I working at home just to keep up, I was taking online classes... and of course I had to rebel and do nothing to "relax."
So the house is a wreck.
I REALLY want to clean it up and post pictures of before and after. I am not sure I want people to know how bad it is, but maybe once I get it under control I'll be okay with it. One challenge I have is that it's kind of like catching up on your laundry or your dishes or for us teachers, catching up all the grading... just because you get it completely clean (or caught up) doesn't mean you never have to clean it again. It's a constant job; it never really ends. The FlyLady system has a lot of built-in routines to address this issue. I am going to try it again. Now if this works I will have to write another blog entry about self-discipline and the Word of God... but more on that later.
A lot of people who know me probably think I am fairly organized. Most of them might be surprised if they came to my house and saw it in the pigsty condition in which it usually stays. Many things have contributed to this. It started when I was working part-time at NorthCrest and I felt guilty because I didn't have my house clean all the time. Well, I guess really it started before that. I was "born organized" as FlyBabies say, but when I started dating Randy I discovered that one could survive while flying by the seat of the pants (Not to be confused with "FLYing.") not just where cleaning is concerned but in many other ways as well. A few years later I wanted to fill my house with more little ones - so I ended up with 3 cats and a dog - and my house got messier and messier. Then my health started interfering, where I couldn't stand up for long periods of time. And somewhere in there my work schedule started interfering too. Not only was I working at home just to keep up, I was taking online classes... and of course I had to rebel and do nothing to "relax."
So the house is a wreck.
I REALLY want to clean it up and post pictures of before and after. I am not sure I want people to know how bad it is, but maybe once I get it under control I'll be okay with it. One challenge I have is that it's kind of like catching up on your laundry or your dishes or for us teachers, catching up all the grading... just because you get it completely clean (or caught up) doesn't mean you never have to clean it again. It's a constant job; it never really ends. The FlyLady system has a lot of built-in routines to address this issue. I am going to try it again. Now if this works I will have to write another blog entry about self-discipline and the Word of God... but more on that later.
Friday, November 16, 2012
I tell it like it used to be.
Yesterday I had this song on my mind. I guess you could take it different ways. I am not living in the past like the writer of the song. It was more like telling it like it will be.
Sometimes I have to fight the negative thoughts in my head. Don't we all, sometimes? Like, I sometimes find myself thinking, "I'm depressed" for no apparent reason. Oh, I have as many reasons as most people to be depressed: a stressful job, more month than money, car troubles once or twice a month, a sick relative (or two or three) at least that often... I could go on, but I won't because I don't want to get depressed. I have just as many, if not more, reasons NOT to be depressed: a wonderful husband, amazing children, a good family, a warm house and a steady job, a great church family and good friends, and I could go on and on.
So yesterday when "I'm depressed" entered my head, I thought, "No, I used to be."
And I thought, I could apply that to so many other negatives in life, not just mine but others' lives as well.
I'm lazy. No, I used to be. Now I'm not.
I'm selfish. No, I used to be. Now I'm giving and caring.
Maybe it's crazy to carry on both sides of a conversation in your mind, but then again, maybe it used to be. Maybe now I'm rational.
Sometimes I have to fight the negative thoughts in my head. Don't we all, sometimes? Like, I sometimes find myself thinking, "I'm depressed" for no apparent reason. Oh, I have as many reasons as most people to be depressed: a stressful job, more month than money, car troubles once or twice a month, a sick relative (or two or three) at least that often... I could go on, but I won't because I don't want to get depressed. I have just as many, if not more, reasons NOT to be depressed: a wonderful husband, amazing children, a good family, a warm house and a steady job, a great church family and good friends, and I could go on and on.
So yesterday when "I'm depressed" entered my head, I thought, "No, I used to be."
And I thought, I could apply that to so many other negatives in life, not just mine but others' lives as well.
I'm lazy. No, I used to be. Now I'm not.
I'm selfish. No, I used to be. Now I'm giving and caring.
Maybe it's crazy to carry on both sides of a conversation in your mind, but then again, maybe it used to be. Maybe now I'm rational.
Monday, May 28, 2012
SI... oh, who cares. When you close your eyes, do you dream about me?
Do you remember this song? I do. Does it have any significant meaning for today's post? Well, it has a significant meaning for today. I woke up early this morning, dreaming about someone from my past. And in my dream I must have been watching something that would have happened 25 plus years ago and I said, "It's all right. One day he is going to realize what he's missed out on and it's going to be too late."
And he did.
And it was.
And now I have these dreams from time to time and sometimes they worry me because back in the day I would dream about him two nights in a row and find out that something had happened, like his grandmother died, and there was something else, but I don't remember what. Maybe when his aunt died, I don't know. I didn't have a premonition about his mother, I can tell you that. Well, I did in a way... a few months before she died I dreamed about him and wondered. Nothing specific though.
I am still working on improvements (cleaning, specifically) and starting tomorrow (it's a holiday weekend) I'll go back to working on something for school every day, or every weekday at least. I'm trying to do healthy things for myself too and I'm learning about herbs again. I've been thinking about this for awhile, and I have toyed with the idea for a long time, but yesterday I was talking with my mom about... of all things, medical marijuana. Now, we didn't get into the whole, "This could be good for you," thing. Nothing that deep, of course; it was more speculation on whether someone we know from a state where medicinal use is legal has a prescription. She says no but this person is using it illegally. I said maybe he or she is, maybe he or she is not, but if this person is using it, he/she very likely has an rx. Mom didn't think this person had the financial resources to get a prescription. It was at that point I stopped arguing with her because... well, there comes a point in family arguments/discussions where tensions and voices are raised and motives are questioned (and you really do not want to know what motives have been questioned in the past). We had not come to that point yet and I didn't think it was worth going there. And somehow my thought process came around to what would I do if I couldn't teach anymore... I guess because the subject of our discussion is unemployed. I thought, nuc med jobs are scarce everywhere, and if for some reason I couldn't teach, I'd want to move somewhere like Arizona and become a midwife or an herbalist or something like that. I think another thought on my mind was what someone like Mom would do. I don't know what she is going to do now. I don't know how long she can keep her disability, her insurance, and all of that. And how many people are out there who don't have insurance? Who don't have treatments for diseases like cancer? There's a lot to think about.
So is that what I need to do? I don't think so. I think teaching is the thing for me right now. Someday it may not be, and when that happens, at least I know there are options out there.
And he did.
And it was.
And now I have these dreams from time to time and sometimes they worry me because back in the day I would dream about him two nights in a row and find out that something had happened, like his grandmother died, and there was something else, but I don't remember what. Maybe when his aunt died, I don't know. I didn't have a premonition about his mother, I can tell you that. Well, I did in a way... a few months before she died I dreamed about him and wondered. Nothing specific though.
I am still working on improvements (cleaning, specifically) and starting tomorrow (it's a holiday weekend) I'll go back to working on something for school every day, or every weekday at least. I'm trying to do healthy things for myself too and I'm learning about herbs again. I've been thinking about this for awhile, and I have toyed with the idea for a long time, but yesterday I was talking with my mom about... of all things, medical marijuana. Now, we didn't get into the whole, "This could be good for you," thing. Nothing that deep, of course; it was more speculation on whether someone we know from a state where medicinal use is legal has a prescription. She says no but this person is using it illegally. I said maybe he or she is, maybe he or she is not, but if this person is using it, he/she very likely has an rx. Mom didn't think this person had the financial resources to get a prescription. It was at that point I stopped arguing with her because... well, there comes a point in family arguments/discussions where tensions and voices are raised and motives are questioned (and you really do not want to know what motives have been questioned in the past). We had not come to that point yet and I didn't think it was worth going there. And somehow my thought process came around to what would I do if I couldn't teach anymore... I guess because the subject of our discussion is unemployed. I thought, nuc med jobs are scarce everywhere, and if for some reason I couldn't teach, I'd want to move somewhere like Arizona and become a midwife or an herbalist or something like that. I think another thought on my mind was what someone like Mom would do. I don't know what she is going to do now. I don't know how long she can keep her disability, her insurance, and all of that. And how many people are out there who don't have insurance? Who don't have treatments for diseases like cancer? There's a lot to think about.
So is that what I need to do? I don't think so. I think teaching is the thing for me right now. Someday it may not be, and when that happens, at least I know there are options out there.
Thursday, May 24, 2012
SI wk 0 day 6: School's out for summer
Not quite forever just yet...
I really enjoyed my day today. I wasn't at school all that long and I came home and piddled around here after that. I decided that every day I'm going to try to do several things.
One, I'm going to do something each day to improve my health. Today... well, I ate broccoli and cheese for supper, along with baked beans. Not the healthiest meal but not the worst either. I didn't exercise today because my feet have hurt just about all day. I relaxed. Isn't that good?
Two, I'm going to do something fun every day, or some kind of treat to myself. Now you have to realize that I can have fun with a lot of different things! I did several fun things today. I watched "The Women of SNL" which was pretty funny. I've relaxed on the hammock several times (isn't that healthy too?). I worked on my Jux account, because I'm thinking about trying to sell some medical photography. Maybe...
Three, I'm doing something school-related each day because I have lots of good ideas and I'd like to get ahead of the game. I had to set a limit on that - no more than four hours a day. There will be days when I have to do more than four hours a day, because of professional development and such. I'm excited though. Today was a half-day so there was my four hours.
Four, I'm going to do something spiritual every day. That's sort of broad... a lot of things fit in here. Doing something for somebody would fit, as would singing in a nursing home. Could I count meditating in the hammock here?
Finally, I'm going to do something for the home each day. I washed dishes and a load of clothes. I folded a load of clothes, and I dusted the dresser in the master bedroom. I had to deal with Sonny's urine... don't want to talk about that. I haven't done a lot of housework but I've done something today and will improve tomorrow.
I really enjoyed my day today. I wasn't at school all that long and I came home and piddled around here after that. I decided that every day I'm going to try to do several things.
One, I'm going to do something each day to improve my health. Today... well, I ate broccoli and cheese for supper, along with baked beans. Not the healthiest meal but not the worst either. I didn't exercise today because my feet have hurt just about all day. I relaxed. Isn't that good?
Two, I'm going to do something fun every day, or some kind of treat to myself. Now you have to realize that I can have fun with a lot of different things! I did several fun things today. I watched "The Women of SNL" which was pretty funny. I've relaxed on the hammock several times (isn't that healthy too?). I worked on my Jux account, because I'm thinking about trying to sell some medical photography. Maybe...
Three, I'm doing something school-related each day because I have lots of good ideas and I'd like to get ahead of the game. I had to set a limit on that - no more than four hours a day. There will be days when I have to do more than four hours a day, because of professional development and such. I'm excited though. Today was a half-day so there was my four hours.
Four, I'm going to do something spiritual every day. That's sort of broad... a lot of things fit in here. Doing something for somebody would fit, as would singing in a nursing home. Could I count meditating in the hammock here?
Finally, I'm going to do something for the home each day. I washed dishes and a load of clothes. I folded a load of clothes, and I dusted the dresser in the master bedroom. I had to deal with Sonny's urine... don't want to talk about that. I haven't done a lot of housework but I've done something today and will improve tomorrow.
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
SI wk 0, day 4: And when I'm itchy, I scratch.
Anybody remember this one? It was from Sesame Street back in the 70's.
Today did not start well. Randy played yesterday's messages and we learned that Derek's surgery has been postponed for two weeks. This means his jaw will be wired shut when we planned to go on vacation. That means we've got to reschedule not just us but six or seven more people. But he is a good kid; he said not to worry about him. Bless his heart.
After that we discovered that the cat crapped in the bath tub and vomited in the hall. Not only that but he crapped on a towel in the bathroom too. Not a good morning.
Work was easy, relatively... my first block took their exam and I graded it, and spent most of the rest of the day doing the end-of-year packing and paperwork. We have 1.5 more days, and I'll spend them doing more of the same. It's all right. I'm going to spend a little time each week preparing for next year.
Randy is practicing and Derek went to spend the night with a buddy. Rach moved out today, to start her new summer job as a youth worker intern at a church in Nashville. I've been sitting here itching all evening. I don't know if the loveseat's got fleas or what. (That would figure, wouldn't it?) I need to stop being so lazy but I figure I'll work hard tomorrow. Just doing some laundry tonight.
Saturday, May 19, 2012
Summer Improvements Week 0: It's a beautiful morning
I should've started my series on Thursday. That night I had a sink full of dishes that no one had touched for days. I felt bad about it because I hadn't done them... but nobody else here had either! (In my defense, I had transcription work Monday night and Tuesday night and choir practice at church Wednesday night - after working all day at school those days) Thursday night Randy had a dinner for work and I didn't want him to come home to this yet again.My plan was to take pictures as I made progress. I took pictures as I waded through the dishes but didn't take one when I finished! Well, it does look better. With neuropathy, standing for long enough to wash that many in one session is not an option. It took me four short sessions to do it (broken up by laundry-folding sessions) but three hours later I got it all done. So far it still looks pretty good!!!
So today I started my walking program again. There are so many dogs in this subdivision. I don't mind dogs but all the barking... well, if their owners don't like it they shouldn't have dogs, right??? I no longer own a dog. :( I miss my dog. I sometimes worry that people will be annoyed because the dogs are barking at me and it's all my fault for walking. But since most of the neighbors are dog owners, I guess I'm worrying for nothing.I saw a lot of pretty birds today.I don't have a lot planned today. I'm going to graduation tonight, but other than that just getting ready for homecoming, maybe doing a little housekeeping. Not going home tomorrow. so I guess I'll call Mom. I have to go into "town" at some point and deposit a check, get creamer, and I might look for some plants while I'm out. I dreamed I got some... I also dreamed I went to Hawaii.I actually made it all the way around the circle with the exception of the part between my house and the highway, then took a break in the hammock for 10 to 15 minutes, came in and had breakfast (a peanut butter sandwich on wheat bread). Now I've got to get up and take my medicine, change the litter, and just do what comes up!
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Paperback writer...
Not really... while I am constantly coming up with ideas for story writing, I don't know who would want to read that. I'm not sure if anybody reads this!!!
Lots going on right now. I'm working on my research paper. It's due tomorrow. I've done the research. I'm just putting it together and trying to find some sources to back up my opinions. My research is about technology in the classroom. Of course! So right now I'm taking a blogging break. I'm listening to 70's music which seems to foster my creativity for some reason. I think it puts me back into my childhood where my imagination is nice and functional. Maybe that makes me weird. Maybe I'm weird anyway.
Besides that, this weekend I have to get all my stuff planned for my students for Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday because I'll be at the HOSA State Conference those days. I have to clean out the car so I can put my competitors in it, as well as my stuff for three days. While I'm there I plan to finish updating the student database for the grading program, although I have discovered that this job isn't going to be finished as long as I'm working on it (and probably, working there as well). Every time a teacher joins the school's site (and there are still quite a few to go) I'll have to update students. It's inevitable. It's okay, though. I just work on it when I can.
I also need to catch up on grading this weekend, and go by the school Sunday and pick up journals to grade too. The amusement never ends.
I'm okay with it though. I have enough to do outside the house tomorrow to make it okay to stay home and write today. I'm working on something that I have a passion for - computers and technology education - and that makes it easier. I have decided that I'm going to get my doctorate in instructional technology. Not sure what school yet - I've got to decide, but I have a year or two to do that. This summer Derek's having surgery and I'm taking a break from my studies. If I do any extra work, it'll be transcription. In the fall I'll either take one or two courses, and if I take two I'll be able to take two in the spring to graduate. If it takes me longer, so be it.
God is good to me... He gave me awesome kids and an amazing husband and the rest of my family's pretty great too. I have more than I know what to do with... life is good. Rachel's doing a formal this weekend and one next weekend. D's going to the prom next weekend. He made a 29 on his ACT! This was his 1st try! Rachel did too, on her 2nd try. Both of them are very smart! I've got a great church family but a lot going on there too... can't go into that on the blog but suffice it to say I have things I don't want to take care of there. I'll be glad when I'm no longer the chair of the PPR committee.
Well, that's what's happening... for what it's worth.
Thursday, March 08, 2012
live like... you were dying???
The day Derek was born, I called our church (at the time). It was, after all, Wednesday evening and everyone would want to know. The young lady who answered the phone was a high school senior and the daughter of a couple who had made us feel so at home in our short time there. Now Derek is 17, and today that young lady's youngest son died at the age of 10, after fighting a brain tumor for over a year. I had hoped I would catch her to give her a cap Randy got. I'm sorry that I didn't get that cap to her and Andrew.
Shortly after I heard that, I read a blog post by a woman who has lost 200 pounds. It was called "45 Simple Actions to Start Losing Weight." One of the actions: "Deal with Stress." I'm not sure how to do that. I guess I need to figure that out. This woman wrote about the stress she had from her job. I know that feeling. Some days I hate it. This week, I'm trying to get everything done so I won't have to do it during Spring Break, next week. Unfortunately, I haven't figured out how to get everything in. I planned to go visit Billie and Andrew last weekend. I kept over-extending myself. I stayed too long at Mom's, then at Dad's, on Saturday. Not that I regret that, I don't regret visiting my parents at all... but then I was going to eat at a fundraiser with Randy. I then had to finish a transcription assignment that I didn't complete Friday evening, because I got a late start.
Shortly after I heard that, I read a blog post by a woman who has lost 200 pounds. It was called "45 Simple Actions to Start Losing Weight." One of the actions: "Deal with Stress." I'm not sure how to do that. I guess I need to figure that out. This woman wrote about the stress she had from her job. I know that feeling. Some days I hate it. This week, I'm trying to get everything done so I won't have to do it during Spring Break, next week. Unfortunately, I haven't figured out how to get everything in. I planned to go visit Billie and Andrew last weekend. I kept over-extending myself. I stayed too long at Mom's, then at Dad's, on Saturday. Not that I regret that, I don't regret visiting my parents at all... but then I was going to eat at a fundraiser with Randy. I then had to finish a transcription assignment that I didn't complete Friday evening, because I got a late start.
Then I had classwork to do before midnight Sunday night. Though I fooled around a little and napped on Sunday afternoon after lunch, I managed to get that done at a reasonable time. Then I didn't leave myself enough time to grade my students' work because when I got through with my classwork I played online Boggle for too long. I gave up Spider Solitaire for Lent and then turned around and started playing Boggle. I am not all that great at it, and last night I decided to give it up too.
Yesterday, a couple of students and I talked about that song, "Live Like You Were Dying." They didn't really get it. I said, you know, we shouldn't live our lives waiting for something to happen later. Live like you're dying doesn't mean lie in the bed waiting for the angels to escort you home. It means live now, instead of putting things off until later. I don't know if I adequately conveyed my feelings. But in the last two weeks, when so many people have died, it means so much more.
I started teaching in August of 2009 and in the whirlwind of never-ending work and the heat of that first classroom, I lost 13 pounds in 3 months. Since then I have put on almost 30 pounds. Oh, it varies from day to day. This morning it was actually 24.5 pounds. And in November 2008, I think I even weighed less than that Nov. 2009 weight. I hate that I've gained so much weight. I don't hate myself and I don't even hate my body, but I need to get in better shape because I want to be healthier. I know a great deal of my problem is stress. I come home, eat, and have to do more work before bed. Some nights (like tonight) I put off working until it's too late. I really don't waste a ton of time on Facebook, but I spend a lot of time looking for that elusive nuclear medicine job, or some other job that promises more money and more time to relax outside of work. Next thing I know, it's 10:30, I haven't read or relaxed, I'm depressed from not finding that "perfect" job, I've still got a sack full of ungraded work and piles of housework to do, and I need to get to bed.
I don't always work as efficiently as I should. Some days I write in my blog and spend 30 minutes on Facebook. I did a lot today and I could do a lot more. I could probably stay up all night. I stayed until 7:00 doing work and grading journals. I have two more classes of journals, posters to grade, and exams to grade. I'm going to bed. I need to start living again.
But I didn't want to turn this into a story about me. I wanted to say, we all need to live like we're dying. We need to live. We need to love. We may need to work too, but we can't keep putting off our lives, because the future isn't promised. Today is a gift and we need to be grateful for it.
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Love is in the air...
Probably the most overused blog title on this day. So what?
We celebrated Valentine's Day in the tradition we started the night before Derek was born. It was raining hard that night. I was scheduled to be induced at 7 the next morning. We dropped Rachel, then 2.5, off with Randy's sister Amy & her family. There weren't as many places to eat around here then. We went to Red Lobster, and it was packed. We looked somewhere else, but I can't remember where. Anyway, we finally went to Cracker Barrel and they got us in. We sat at a quiet little table for two with one of those oil lamps... it was very sweet and even a little romantic.
After that, it was kind of hard to get a babysitter for Valentine's Day in the middle of the week. It was just easier to take the kids along and make it a family meal. We haven't done it every year, and Rachel couldn't be with us this year. We talked about it, but Derek was going to a competition today, and we weren't sure when he'd be home. In the meantime, she made plans to go to church tonight. It just didn't time out for us to all go together.
Well, now Randy's going to bed and I'm watching a show about a group that's working against gang violence in Chicago. When I decided to become a teacher, I didn't get into it to be a community changer. I thought I would work at Sycamore, where I could work the hours my kids were in school and be available to go to their sports events and be off when D was practicing for football. And I was, even though I didn't work at Sycamore. But I was teaching in a different universe. I was teaching in South Nashville, where I really felt like I got to know my students and I felt like I was making a difference in the lives of the kids.
I liked it, but when the opportunity to work closer to home came, I took it. I loved my new classroom, but I missed the community. I still miss it, really, but I know there are kids who need help here too. There aren't as many businesses wanting to throw money at the public school system here, but I know a lot of the kids are living in those same types of communities... kids getting shot (there were three young adults shot last semester, most known by many kids from school), kids getting killed in car accidents, kids who are being abused, neglected, you name it. It's a crazy world, and yet, if we'd lived 300 yards east of here, our kids would've been zoned for it. And even though we live 15 miles from the "hood," we only have to look out the living room window to see a lot of the same issues. Our neighbors (and I'm not just talking about the ones in the subdivision) don't look different from us, but they have family in jail, and problems. The mission field is right around me.
We celebrated Valentine's Day in the tradition we started the night before Derek was born. It was raining hard that night. I was scheduled to be induced at 7 the next morning. We dropped Rachel, then 2.5, off with Randy's sister Amy & her family. There weren't as many places to eat around here then. We went to Red Lobster, and it was packed. We looked somewhere else, but I can't remember where. Anyway, we finally went to Cracker Barrel and they got us in. We sat at a quiet little table for two with one of those oil lamps... it was very sweet and even a little romantic.
After that, it was kind of hard to get a babysitter for Valentine's Day in the middle of the week. It was just easier to take the kids along and make it a family meal. We haven't done it every year, and Rachel couldn't be with us this year. We talked about it, but Derek was going to a competition today, and we weren't sure when he'd be home. In the meantime, she made plans to go to church tonight. It just didn't time out for us to all go together.
Well, now Randy's going to bed and I'm watching a show about a group that's working against gang violence in Chicago. When I decided to become a teacher, I didn't get into it to be a community changer. I thought I would work at Sycamore, where I could work the hours my kids were in school and be available to go to their sports events and be off when D was practicing for football. And I was, even though I didn't work at Sycamore. But I was teaching in a different universe. I was teaching in South Nashville, where I really felt like I got to know my students and I felt like I was making a difference in the lives of the kids.
I liked it, but when the opportunity to work closer to home came, I took it. I loved my new classroom, but I missed the community. I still miss it, really, but I know there are kids who need help here too. There aren't as many businesses wanting to throw money at the public school system here, but I know a lot of the kids are living in those same types of communities... kids getting shot (there were three young adults shot last semester, most known by many kids from school), kids getting killed in car accidents, kids who are being abused, neglected, you name it. It's a crazy world, and yet, if we'd lived 300 yards east of here, our kids would've been zoned for it. And even though we live 15 miles from the "hood," we only have to look out the living room window to see a lot of the same issues. Our neighbors (and I'm not just talking about the ones in the subdivision) don't look different from us, but they have family in jail, and problems. The mission field is right around me.
Sunday, January 22, 2012
It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday...
I think I've used this song title before, but so what?
Yesterday we had to say goodbye to our Bonnie. She was 13 and in kidney failure, and even if we'd treated her and held on to her a little longer, we would've just had to watch that painful slope downward. It was hard to let her go, but we decided that it was better to go on and do it than to keep dragging it out... for her and for us. It hasn't been easy though. I cried. A LOT. I could cry now, if I let myself, but late night cries are not good for my sinuses and I've got to be on top of things tomorrow. I just have to remind myself that even if we'd brought her home, she would never be her old healthy self again. Three years ago I was pretty sure it would be our last Christmas with her, so I have felt like we were blessed to have her as long as we did.
I am still having terrible problems with my feet. If I have to stand or walk a lot, I may not hurt then, but I pay for it later. That's the worst. I don't like knowing that if I go shopping, I'll have to hurt later (if not sooner). And I'm not talking about a mall marathon, I'm talking about going to the grocery. In all honesty, I'm thinking it's time for me to get a desk job (and no, teaching is NOT a desk job... at least not at my school) but that scares me too. Will I weigh 500 pounds if I don't have to stand up a lot? I read about three medicines, over the counter supplements, that I started yesterday (only after I looked them up for interactions with my current meds). I hope they'll work...
I do entirely too much complaining, so let me tell a happy story. Today we celebrated my mom's birthday. She is 63 and this means she has lived longer than her mom and both her grandmothers did. I used to say I was going to party like nobody's business when I made it to number 63, but now, it'll be no big deal because Mom has been there first. AND THAT IS ALL RIGHT. Now, if you are one of my Facebook friends don't pass that around... I have many more FB friends than I do blog followers so I figure I'm safe to tell her age here, LOL!!!
Yesterday we had to say goodbye to our Bonnie. She was 13 and in kidney failure, and even if we'd treated her and held on to her a little longer, we would've just had to watch that painful slope downward. It was hard to let her go, but we decided that it was better to go on and do it than to keep dragging it out... for her and for us. It hasn't been easy though. I cried. A LOT. I could cry now, if I let myself, but late night cries are not good for my sinuses and I've got to be on top of things tomorrow. I just have to remind myself that even if we'd brought her home, she would never be her old healthy self again. Three years ago I was pretty sure it would be our last Christmas with her, so I have felt like we were blessed to have her as long as we did.
I am still having terrible problems with my feet. If I have to stand or walk a lot, I may not hurt then, but I pay for it later. That's the worst. I don't like knowing that if I go shopping, I'll have to hurt later (if not sooner). And I'm not talking about a mall marathon, I'm talking about going to the grocery. In all honesty, I'm thinking it's time for me to get a desk job (and no, teaching is NOT a desk job... at least not at my school) but that scares me too. Will I weigh 500 pounds if I don't have to stand up a lot? I read about three medicines, over the counter supplements, that I started yesterday (only after I looked them up for interactions with my current meds). I hope they'll work...
I do entirely too much complaining, so let me tell a happy story. Today we celebrated my mom's birthday. She is 63 and this means she has lived longer than her mom and both her grandmothers did. I used to say I was going to party like nobody's business when I made it to number 63, but now, it'll be no big deal because Mom has been there first. AND THAT IS ALL RIGHT. Now, if you are one of my Facebook friends don't pass that around... I have many more FB friends than I do blog followers so I figure I'm safe to tell her age here, LOL!!!
Saturday, December 17, 2011
School's out for...two weeks!
Today I've been a sleepyhead. I think I deserve to be. I've been in school and teaching school and sleep has been a luxury. I HAVE done some work around here & in a few I'll do a little more. I need to do some serious writing today, a little bit of record keeping, and a little research for my at-home job...in addition to a little more cleaning and laundry.
My wonderful rock star is on a grocery run. D is watching "Lost" & Rach is still asleep. I have really appreciated the rock star this week.
Sometimes it takes a drastic thing to make me appreciate what's unique about him. Last weekend the brother of a high school friend died. I remember him but didn't really know him. I went to the funeral home. He was president of his motorcycle club. For those who aren't into the biker culture, this means he was into that lifestyle. The funeral home parking lot was filled with bikes and leather, long grey beards and smoke. The pallbearers had names like Dirt and Birddog. To be quite honest, I was impressed with the organization and the care they took to do everything just right. Bikers seem to like Randy's bands. I have always appreciated that. Maybe there is a part of me that envies that lifestyle. At any rate, I've appreciated more about Randy and his quirks this week
I had decided that my new year's resolution would be to be more creative. I need to lose weight, work out, and be healthier...and maybe I will...but I have so many ideas and so many things I want to learn to do, and I do so little of them. So I'm going to do those things in 2012. I'm going to write more, paint and draw more, maybe write some songs, maybe be more creative in the kitchen. I'm looking forward to this coming year.
My wonderful rock star is on a grocery run. D is watching "Lost" & Rach is still asleep. I have really appreciated the rock star this week.
Sometimes it takes a drastic thing to make me appreciate what's unique about him. Last weekend the brother of a high school friend died. I remember him but didn't really know him. I went to the funeral home. He was president of his motorcycle club. For those who aren't into the biker culture, this means he was into that lifestyle. The funeral home parking lot was filled with bikes and leather, long grey beards and smoke. The pallbearers had names like Dirt and Birddog. To be quite honest, I was impressed with the organization and the care they took to do everything just right. Bikers seem to like Randy's bands. I have always appreciated that. Maybe there is a part of me that envies that lifestyle. At any rate, I've appreciated more about Randy and his quirks this week
I had decided that my new year's resolution would be to be more creative. I need to lose weight, work out, and be healthier...and maybe I will...but I have so many ideas and so many things I want to learn to do, and I do so little of them. So I'm going to do those things in 2012. I'm going to write more, paint and draw more, maybe write some songs, maybe be more creative in the kitchen. I'm looking forward to this coming year.
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